Friday, November 10, 2006

An Emotional Eulogy

Today I would like to express my remorse. I have killed, and I am posting this to express my sorrow for what I have done.
Today at 4:29 PM in my kitchen, I encountered a true warrior. This warrior was clad in crimson, and fought valiantly. When he finally fell from my wall and encountered the bottom of my shoe, I immediately felt that something great had just passed from this world.
Vespula rufa is the scientific name given to all red warriors of the sky, but we more commonly know them as red wasps. It brings me sadness to say that one of those fierce brave spirits has perished doing his duty.
He was a good wasp, a brave wasp. I named him Timothy Millhouse Merryweather Thompson VII. His body was extracted from the bottom of my shoe with a flyswatter and placed ceremoniously in the trash.
Hopefully he ascended into Valhalla where he will face off with his fellow warriors for eternity in the day and feast from the pig of eternity all night for all time.
I request that each and every one of you take a moment to remember this brave soul.
Jason

2 comments:

ACM Gates said...

Well why'd you kill it if you didn't want to?... you ARE talking about tredding on a wasp, right?

*original comment: Nov 11, 2006, 11:08 AM

Nellie Hardenbrook said...

That's funny cuz at first I thought you were talking about a ldaybug.

We need to have a proper funeral for poor Timothy Millhouse Merryweather Thompson VII. This is a sad day. I shall pass through the stages of grief very slowly.

*original comment: Nov 11, 2006, 5:34 PM